Republican Senator for Alaska Lisa Murkowski, long known to oppose the Trump administration’s policies, found herself pushed into a corner Wednesday morning as she searched for the exit after denying Senator Feinstein her outlandish request, “I just don’t think it would be prudent or believable,” she pleaded.
A number of minority women on the Democratic party (including ex-White House advisor Omarosa Manigault) declined to support the Senator’s conspiracy tirade by claiming sexual abuse via leather bondage, a storyline drummed up from repeated viewings of the tween movie “50 Shades of Grey” found in Feinstein’s office. The exhausted Legislator was seen fuming through the Capital basement prior to her regularly scheduled tube feeding.
The GOP now faces a fourth victim put forward at the behest of OJ Simpson’s original attorney Robert Shapiro (rumored he and Feinstein regularly attend a support group for Dementia together). In the spirit of nostalgia for his old friend Johnnie Cochran, Shapiro lamented the cliche on behalf of his client’s case, “If the President fits, his thingy smells like shit.” A picture of the victim has been released which can be seen here.
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